So this is inspired by a post I read recently.
Dear Pakistani Women,
I am going to get straight to the point – STOP going against your own gender! Especially because you out of all the people know exactly the struggles, the difficulties and the obstacles every Pakistani women face and still you decide to go ahead and make it worse for them!
What is wrong with you?! Why do you do this?! Why do you feel the need to judge other women for things you would never want to be judged for in the first place?! You know it isn’t easy being just a mother but you would critise the hell out of a working mother who is doing her best!
But most important of all you know that domestic abuse and violence is a horrible, horrible thing and yet you still encourage it!! Yes you do encourage it and it’s way past the time for you to stop and acknowledge that and CHANGE!
You encourage it by not standing up to it!
By hushing it up!
By being part of a society that accepts it and hides it!
By considering it to be a taboo!
By bringing up girls, telling them that this abuse/violence is normal!
By telling the victim to man up and move on “like we all have”!
By telling them if they don’t have any choice but to put up with it because of “what will people say”!
By telling them to put up with it because you can’t afford to support her!
By not believing them because you think the abuser is a “decent guy”!
By bringing up boys, making them think that they are some sort of King who could do what ever they like!
By making girls and boys think that girls should always serve boys first!
By telling girls that they should only do as the men in family say!
It is not right!!
You have got to change this! You have to bring up boys to respect and care for their sisters and other female relatives because then they will learn to respect and care for their wives and daughters! And for God’s sake, don’t be jealous of him treating his wife right!! Be proud of it!
Yes there are fathers or other male relatives that will always teach them the opposite but you being the mother have an upper hand as you’re their first and lifelong teacher! Keep teaching them to respect girls and don’t let the “other side” win! Be strict with the boys rather than just the girls!
Teach girls to be stronger and not dependant on men! Teach them that they shouldn’t put up with abuse/violence of any sorts! Teach them that they matter too!! Teach them that they will have your support no matter what so she can go and be brave in this cruel world! Teach them how to stand on their own two feet!
To end it off, those of you who are already making these changes, hats off to you and keep it up because in the long run these little changes will be the reason that our society’s way of thinking will change!
PS. I think the above could also be applied to Indian and Bengali women too but I know more about Pakistani women it’s addressed to them…but the others should take not too! 😁